Dejected...

I couldn't sleep last night. Got the news that I won't be taking Netball anymore because I'm going over to help the Boys' Brigade. Reason being, Netball is not a niche CCA and we are not going for competition this year and Boys' Brigade needs help. I'm really quite affected because I really love Netball and I took so much effort to persuade the P3 girls to join us. I'm really afraid that the girls will think that I've tricked them into the CCA and also that they might quit because of that.

Also, this incident makes me feel that 'holistic education' is only a name we put on education. Most activities in schools are not holistic at all. Just because we didn't get medals for the school and we are not the niche, we are deemed as unimportant. Maybe this wasn't explicitly expressed to us. But I felt it implicitly conveyed through what the school said and did. Yes I do know that it is impossible to focus on EVERYTHING. But at least let me do the best that I can in the things that I want to strive in. All niche areas start from the scratch. I wasn't even given a chance to start from the scratch.

I'm uncertained about my goals now. I think it's time to pray for new directions in my life.